We reflect on our life every day but we do extra reflection on Sundays. I think a part of that is that we listen to sermons from 5 churches online on Sundays so it makes us reflect more. We do attend our local church on another day so it’s kind of started a tradition with us on each Sunday to listen to 4-5 other church sermons each Sunday. We grow a lot together from this.
We also reflect on each other as we listen to the sermons and what all is happening in our lives at that moment. We may even talk for 1-2 minutes in the middle of the sermon that we are listening to if something really touches us. We believe this is a part of what makes our marriage strong as we have been doing this for a while now.
Today we were thinking back when I told Sandy that she should come off the birth control. That was back in 2010 around this time. We don’t remember the exact day but we are pretty sure it was around April of that year.
I told her that we will just do natural planning as we weren’t ready for a child yet. Before this I wasn’t even sure if I wanted a child ever but I guess God was working on my heart around this time.
Our plan was to have sex only on days that she would not be fertile at least that was the plan. A few months later we found the church that we go to now and I have told the story in the past how all that came to be,
God was really working on my heart through this time. I think my subconscience knew it was time for baby even though I was saying no but we started really growing together and then we find such an awesome church.
Well right around the one year mark of her being off the birth control, we conceived Lil Chris. We didn’t know then but later we looked back and realized that we did something on her most fertile day and here we are pregnant.
I knew she was pregnant before she was. I told her shes pregnant even though she was like, no I am just a little late. I told her I believe she was even though the test we took came out inconclusive.
So we took her in to get a test and by this point I was already sold on a baby and would have been disappointed if she wasn’t pregnant but she was very much pregnant. I remember that day like it was yesterday. I was so excited and this is coming from a man that didn’t believe he ever wanted kids.
God really worked on my heart before this to get me prepared to handle mentally the baby because if she would have gotten pregnant a year earlier, my mind would have been different so I am glad that God knew what he was doing and taking this in stages for me and also that I was willing to listen to God.
As we look back now and Lil Chris is over 4 years old, its been crazy. We were still so scared but we knew we would love him and life with him has been so awesome. We can’t imagine life without him now. It is going to be so awesome watching him grow into a man one day and to see what God wants to do in and through him!
We believe everyone should take at least one day and week and reflect back on the past week. Reflect back on your past and also talk about what is ahead in the next week. When couples do small things like this, it makes a huge difference because this builds a bond between the two of you and the more you do it, the closer you become.
It is when couples quit talking and reflecting that they start to pull away. Some form of talking should happen everyday but you can make big reflections happen at least once a week as a goal to start out. If you pick a day that the both of you can be all in and you hold to that, you won’t believe what can happen in a short time!
Chris Benton
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